Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in Keith's LiveJournal:

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Wednesday, September 20th, 2006
8:41 pm	I'm such a good eunich-friend Well, I haven't had a friend speech in quite some time. That was refreshing. It's funny, there's something in the way I behave around girls I'm interested in that seems to make me their best friend. I tend to become a confidant to the object of my affection, and that's cool, but very not cool. My personal hell is the sentence 'Why can't I find a nice guy like you?' said by girl who knows I like her. Woman logic never ceases to baffle me... 'I always end up with assholes, I wish I could date a nice guy who actually really likes me. Oh hey, this guy is nice and he likes me... I bet he'll listen to me about my man problems...' So yeah, I honestly do appreciate the advice and words of support, but No, I do not worry too much, No. I am not making it more complicated than it really is. No, she is not so obviously into me, No, I should not quit being a wuss and just tell her already. No, it is not going to be fine. No, seriously, I know what I'm talking about here, you're wrong. Goddamn Current Mood: fuckyou Current Music: *sigh* (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Tuesday, August 8th, 2006
1:59 am	I was rather looking forward to going through the same process of taking suggestions and putting them to vote to determine the name of my fantasy football team this year, but I just remembered how sad I was about Pringleton losing last year. So I decided to just name my team Pringleton. My apologies to all of you who have been waiting with bated breath for the opportunity to help name my team. And my thanks to Kevin for giving me such an awesome team name that I eventually got to use. (4 Comments |Comment on this)
Wednesday, April 12th, 2006
11:29 pm	So uhh, is anyone else going to see Coheed and Cambria saturday? (Comment on this)
Sunday, February 12th, 2006
9:22 am	hey dudes, it's my birthday. Obviously I didn't think anything would be different, but for some reason when I woke up this morning and last night wore off, I was really dissatisfied. I had a great time last night, and I really appreciate everybody showing up, and it was super rad. But I'd been looking forward to it for a while, and I loved the idea of it. But now that it's passed I've run out of things to look forward to. So now everything's back to normal, and that's pretty effing depressing. I'm dreading driving back up to Gainesville. I want to keep the illusion that I don't live there... I want to believe I'm home right now, and that at any time I can go hang out at the Simpson's place, or that everybody will come here, and we'll sit around laughing about stupid shit we did a couple weeks ago, and then do stupid shit to laugh about later. Nothing is better this way. It's stupid to want to cling so desperately to my childhood, but I liked it better. Even the really bad aspects of that time in my life that couldn't have possibly gotten worse haven't really improved either. I can't complain since the unsatisfactory condition of my life is due entirely to a lack of effort on my part, but it still makes me unhappy. On another note, someone pointed out to me recently 'All you do is talk about how you think all your friends are better than you. Is that why you seem to hate yourself so much?' I laughed it off at the time, but I thought about it later. I really do constantly compare myself to the people closest to me and all I can think is how all the things I hate about myself, the things that are missing, my closest friends have it. The few things I like about me, my closest friends are better than me in that regard. If I look at any one of my friends I see a few of my shortcomings, and I look at my whole circle of friends and I see how I'm inadequate in every way. I don't think the situation is unique, but I think most people don't look at it this way, and it's probably not very healthy... ...So uhh, ya... I'm 23 and stuff, go me. (6 Comments |Comment on this)
Wednesday, December 7th, 2005
6:26 pm	Good Morning! So ya, I got a little emo over Thanksgiving break obviously, but I can not remember the last time I have been as not okay as I was this morning. I spent much of my time at work in the early hours desperately fighting back tears, occasionally pausing from my work to push my knife into my thigh when I came too close. "Why is it still like this. It's difficult and painful and not bloody fair -make it stop-. I can get through today -can I?- and I can probably get through tomorrow, but what about the day after? What about 6 months from now? What about yet another year -I can't-? How long does it have to be like this -I can stop it at any time-? How can I be expected to keep on like this -I can't-? Why do I still have to feel this way -I don't-? It's not fair -It is so easy to never have to feel this again-." Kinda funny, I put Out of the Fierce Parade on the sound system there, and it made me feel as it always does, which in this case, it cheered me up considerably. Since then my mood has gradually improved and I'm back up to default 'Getting by' status now. The improvement in mood was aided by a call from John's roommate Aaron inviting me to join him at a drag king show he'll be attending in Orlando this evening. I can't afford to drive to Orlando, and having not slept last night, I can't afford to not sleep tonight, but despite that I think I'm going to take him up on that. (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Sunday, November 27th, 2005
3:43 am	Tonight feels just like it did last year I always go to bed aware of the fact that I'm going to bed alone. But on rare occasion it's a more overwhelming feeling. It becomes palpable and I'm not alone anymore... I go to bed with the Empty Space. The Empty Space is very chatty tonight, and she will not let me sleep. (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Friday, November 25th, 2005
4:37 am	Happy Thanksgiving I am thankful for war, famine, hatred, and injustice. Last year was probably just coincidence, but if not, Sunday morning we're going to wake up in a much better world. Current Mood: drunk Current Music: Glassjaw... but I wish I had a turntable right now (Comment on this)
Tuesday, September 13th, 2005
6:36 pm	So last night I had a really weird dream... I was a professional athlete, a baseball player I think (already completely absurd and it just gets crazier). I'm on the verge of breaking some major record of some sort and am expected to do so within one or two more games. But then in a tragic hunting accident, I take a shot from a 12 gauge under the chin. That's right a hunting accident. A hunting accident that resulted in the barrel of a shotgun being discharged point blank under my chin. I have no idea how this occured. And so I died. Standing before God I plead my case. I really want to get that record, but I can't when I'm dead of exploded head disease. So I somehow talk him into turning back time and making it so that my brains were in fact not blown out in a tragic hunting accident. After my conversation with God, I wake up in a hospital bed. As requested, change was made so that I am not dead. However, as where I was hoping the point blank shotgun blast to the head would be entirely removed from the situation, instead, the angle of the barrel under my chin was shifted slightly so that my brain and spine were undamaged but the right side of my face was blown off. Nothing left of the right side of my jaw, my right eye may or may not have been present, and little of my cheek bone and facial skin remained. Realizing I would be in for a lifetime of pain and reconstructive surgery and that I'll probably never again play professional baseball anyway, I called it a loss and killed myself. (4 Comments |Comment on this)
Wednesday, August 24th, 2005
2:19 am	Belligerent Bunnies it is Final results were as follows: Belligerent Bunnies: 5 I'ma Get Funky Now: 5 King Zissou: 0 Pringleton: 2 Squeaky Quackies: 1 You may notice the tie. To settle this I went to an arbitrary chat room somewhere on the internet and offered the two options, the first person to respond chose Belligerent Bunnies, and thus the decision was made. Thank you to all who participated, including whoever the hell that was who made the final decision. (7 Comments |Comment on this)
Tuesday, August 23rd, 2005
3:39 am	I need a name for my football team. I've been gathering potential names for my football team. I appreciate everyones time and effort in this. I've narrowed the list to 5 (I couldn't narrow it to 3 as was the initial plan, it was hard enough getting it this far). I ask everyone to vote from the list below. The name with the most votes before I go to bed Tuesday night will be the name of my football team. The choices are as follows: 1. Belligerent Bunnies 2. I'ma Get Funky Now 3. King Zissou 4. Pringleton 5. Squeaky Quackies kthx (15 Comments |Comment on this)
Saturday, August 20th, 2005
12:03 am	LOOK, I DO LIKE EVERYBODY ELSE! COOL KID! 1. Go here. 2. Pass it on. ( my answers ) (5 Comments |Comment on this)
Tuesday, May 24th, 2005
12:04 am	Hurray NyQuil buzz Being sick kinda sucks but my God I love NyQuil. So yeah, this weekend went very well for the most part, just one hiccup really. Finally saw Episode III with Brot. It receives the seal of approval. And there was baseball, which was quite groovy and I only got a little burned. Dropped in on Paul's moving in party which was also cool. We threw rocks and hit signs with trains. And Tony and I punched each other in the face pretty hard. Got my John and Cassi and Suzanna on. New people were exposed to the wonders of The Fog. <3 The Fog. We also watched the new Dawn of the Dead which was good fun. And interestingly enough, I had a zombie dream afterwords, which started out well enough, but then turned to suck. It was going much better than the last time I had a zombie dream. This time I was in a more familiar and reasonably defensible location, I was with John and other familiar people, most of whom with a decent understanding of zombie protocol (though I really don't know why the asshole who nobody liked who had already been bitten hadn't been killed yet), and I was armed. Anyway everything's going well and I'm chilling in a room of the house we're in. I've got a sword, a handgun, and I'm wearing a thick down vest to discourage neck and shoulder bites. I hear a squeaking sound at the window. I peak around the curtain. There's Zombie Amanda pawing at the glass... I drop my weapons, remove my vest and make my way towards the door. '...Keith?' questions John. 'I'm going out for a bit' I reply. John just looks at me dumbfounded as I walk past him and out the front door. I walk towards Zombie Amanda, and she zombie shambles towards me. We stop. She doesn't attack. We just stand there looking at each other for several moments. Until I put a hand on her shoulder. Then I pull her towards me. My arm is around her shoulders now and her head is against my chest. I put my other hand on the back of her head, running my fingers through her hair, and we stay like that for a few more moments. Then I broke her neck. Worst. Dream. Ever. I woke up fighting back tears. The worst part was, in the dream I got pretty emotional when I first saw her, but after that I felt nothing. I felt nothing when I held her. And I felt nothing when I killed her. I was really upset when I woke up, and it's still bothering me. I need more NyQuil. (5 Comments |Comment on this)
Monday, May 16th, 2005
1:26 am	Make it go away. All of it. Everything. (3 Comments |Comment on this)
Friday, May 13th, 2005
4:10 am	I'm really jealous of Wolf Blitzer. He got so lucky. My life would have been entirely different if my name was Wolf Blitzer. When I was going through school, instead of: 'Hey who's the skinny kid with the glasses?' 'That's Keith Roberts, he's anti-social and lacks self esteem.' 'Keith eh? Let's kick his ass.' It woulda been more like: 'Hey who's the skinny kid with the glasses?' 'That's Wolf Blitzer, he's mysterious and exudes confidence' 'Wolf eh? Let's look upon him with hushed reverence.' Sigh. (1 Comment |Comment on this)
3:05 am	I'm not very good at this. My apologies to Kevin. I don't do it on purpose. I went out, started trying to have a good time, talked to Collin a bit. Eventually Kevin shows up. He introduces me to Ruth, who is quite nice to look at. After introductions he informs me that she's a great dancer and that I should dance with her. This creates complications in my mind. I am introduced to people who are then described as great dancers, after being told this, it is suggested that I dance with them... Of course I think, 'Great dancer aye? Well then I better avoid dancing with her since I obviously can't keep up and would be a tremendous disappointment.' She got out on the floor, I was nearby, and sure enough, she was a great dancer. I found myself intently watching her legs, then I noted that I was just intently watching the seam-up-the-back stockings around said legs. Seam-up-the-back stockings... those bring back memories. And that's all it took. I was controlling it enough to be able to keep a smile and hang out and stuff, but after that I had to go outside and stare at the sky for a while. It's really obnoxious and not fair to the people around me, Kevin especially. I really am trying to enjoy myself out there, it's just really difficult. But I'm working on it. Eventually I'll be able to keep my happy face up all night (without getting drunk). Maybe I'll even talk to people. Probably not, I always feel like I'm intruding on time that could be better spent talking to someone else. But hey, I am pretty inconsiderate, maybe I'll give it a shot. So there's that then. But on the plus side, I'm really attractive, for whatever that's worth. Current Mood: eh, I dunno Current Music: The Mars Volta - Eunuch Provocateur (6 Comments |Comment on this)
Friday, May 6th, 2005
2:51 am	I got this shit Aights, I've finished my non-drinking phase, and have moved on to drinking in moderation. I decided beforehand that tonight I would have 3 drinks (Cinco de Mayo and all) so I had a Corona, shot of bourbon, and half a Bud. I suppose it's too early to say that I'm completely in control, but I did stick to my preset number of drinks tonight, so that's a good sign. And I started back at kung fu on Tuesday. I hurt so much and it feels so wonderful. I really did miss this, and I already look better than I did on Monday. So ya, getting better all the time. In other news, blonde Jen received about 10.4 billion awesome points... We show up at her place for pre-drinks, and I'm sportin my Velvet Teen shirt, and she's like 'I have that shirt'. That's awesome. I see her playlist on her computer, and sure enough, there's some Velvet Teen there, but then I look down in front of her monitor, and she has + - = stickers on her effing desk. Awesome. And I talked to a drunk girl in front of Atlantic tonight... She looked more emo than I did, so I asked what's wrong. She was appearently sad about being so completely drunk. I assured her that it may not be too terribly pleasant at first, but at least in the near future, she won't be drunk anymore. She seemed to appreciate it. That's all I suppose. I'ma get me some lasagna now <3 Current Mood: little of this, little of that Current Music: still listening to EYEWTKAS. bah (Comment on this)
Tuesday, April 26th, 2005
3:34 am	Question: If given one hour to drink free beer, how many beers will Keith drink? Answer: 0 I totally kick ass at this not drinking thing. Free Amber Bock on tap, and I didn't have a drop. Booyah. I was a little jealous when I picked up Spivey and her roommate who were already wasted, but it was cool. If I couldn't be drinking, at least I had drunk people to watch. So anyway, I win. (5 Comments |Comment on this)
Saturday, April 23rd, 2005
6:31 pm	I hate it here. I need to surround myself with people who love me... People I love. All I'm doing now is going out to surround myself with people I'm trying to sell myself to... People I lie to... (3 Comments |Comment on this)
Wednesday, April 20th, 2005
12:27 am	Aight, I've had my fill I've decided that I'm done with the whole drinking to excess thing. I was originally going to stick with it until I stopped wanting to, as I'm sure this is just a phase, but I decided to stop now. It'll be more difficult since I still rather enjoy getting to drunk to think, but a challenge is a good thing. I'm not swearing of alcohol for life or some craziness like that, but I don't plan on walking quite so much anymore. I'm going to throw myself in on the deep end, and I'm not going to drink for a couple weeks or so, and then afterwords go back to drinking moderately. This will be kind of annoying this Thursday because lord knows as much as I can't dance, it's even more pathetic without a drink or two, but oh well. Oh and believe it or not, this decision was not inspired by how I felt at work today. I just decided it was time. So ya, that's that. Should be an adventure. (8 Comments |Comment on this)
Tuesday, April 19th, 2005
3:22 am	Hooooly shit, lovers... I am drunk like burning... I'll update this motherbitcher when I can see the effing keyboard. But for now, just know that I am so effing wasted that I don't even know where my bed is..... oh fuck I promised Jose that I would do the dishes when I got home... I don't fuckin know where the kitchen is... oh, and 9 o'clock comes awful early in the morning..... fuvck...... I love you all. <3 Current Mood: alcohol poisoning Current Music: Against Me! - Pints of Guinness make you strong (3 Comments |Comment on this)